Cold Paradise
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And, like that, it was over.Agatha’s mother was dead. The funeral was over and my wife was home. Kat was avoiding both of us, though for different reasons. On the first night after she came home, Agatha wanted to debrief about her trip.We sat on the couch with a bottle of wine and Kat hid in her room—the room that had so briefly been ours while my wife was away.Agatha told me about her trip, the funeral. She nearly came to tears once and I comforted her with a hand on the back, feeling as though I were playacting a husband. The secrets of what had transpired without her seemed to be alive in the room with us.We finished one glass of wine and then another until, finally, Agatha rose.“I think I’ll start heading for bed,” she said.“See you soon,” I said, accepting the brief kiss she planted on me.Only when she had disappeared down the hallway did the door to Kat’s bedroom open and she came creeping out, wet and fresh from the shower in her bathrobe.Kat slipped into me and through the crook of my arm. The weight of her felt good in my lap, even with the added mass of the baby bump.“Hi, daddy,” she said in a voice that apologized for her. I kissed her with abandon.Her robe, starting to strain over her belly, slipped open at the chest, revealing a swollen, pink nipple. I smiled at her and teased downwards with my lips, gaziantep manken escort but she jerked away.“Not until you’ve made your decision,” she said, roughly.“I made my choice a long time ago, baby,” I said. “You. I choose you.”I watched Kat’s face as it battled between girlish delight and adult solemnity. Then, her smile broke and she allowed me to kiss her. She was steam and lavender.“When?” she said.“Before the baby comes. We can leave the farm behind,” I said, “but we need some money to get us started.”Then, she frowned. “How?”“What if,” I started, “what if you transferred schools in the next semester? We could tell Agatha about the pregnancy, say you wanted to get away from that boy—I wanted you away from that boy, whatever—and I’ll go with you. Just to move you in, get you settled, be overprotective. Then I just…send home the divorce papers.”I watched Kat’s face. Something flickered along her brow when I mentioned the school, and her lips tightened at the name of Hunter. When she spoke, she spoke slowly.“I could go to A_______,” she said. “They’re the University’s sister school so, I’d already be in.”There was a warning knock against the inside of my chest. It wasn’t the point I expected her to stick to.“I was thinking,” I stopped, gaziantep masaj yapan escort casting an ear down the hall to where Agatha had disappeared. “Farther. I might be able to take some money with us, something she won’t find in the divorce. I was thinking.”I stopped again before the plunge. Kat’s clear eyes were fixed on mine. Her lower lip was parted.“The Southwest somewhere,” I finished, adding hurriedly. “Even, we could take Light. We couldn’t have a real ceremony, but we share a name. No one would know.”That something passed again across Kat’s brow and I couldn’t place it. I wanted to get away from Agatha, far away where no one would know us and we could remake our lives. I had thought it was what Kat wanted too, but I saw—thought I saw—that she was only just coming to terms with what I was asking from her now. Something was keeping her here after all, even after her brave talk days before. Something that I had a sickening feeling in my chest was the boy from her college.“It could work,” she said, softly. My doubts ebbed.I looked down at her face to see her lip curl and her eyes flick up to mine.“You really mean it don’t you,” she said.I leaned into her for a light kiss and let my hand slide out to part the open V of her gaziantep masöz escort robe. We kissed for a long time, hands reaching and groping.“Do you have it?” I whispered.Kat nodded and guided my hand into her wide pocket. My fist closed around the cold, metal circle of the ring. I took it out and held it out in front of us.“Katherine,” I said, heart shuddering, “will you marry me?”Her lips pressed together and her eyes closed.“Yes, daddy,” she whispered.I slid the ring on over her finger and, suddenly, Kat’s hands were all over me, groping, rubbing. I kissed her, avidly, letting the room around us fade away and the knowledge of Agatha, preparing for sleep in the other room to pass out of worry. In that moment, she had ceased to be my wife in my mind. I my heart, with my lips wrapped around those of my daughter, Agatha and I were divorced.Kat glanced down the hallway.“She went to bed,” I said.Kat grinned and kissed me again, harder.As Kat’s hands became less and less restrained, riding up my shirt and pawing open her robe, I felt a stone growing in my chest. I had made a decision. It was real and I was leaving my wife of three years behind. Already, our life together was retreating, gathering dust, and losing color. Kat was all that was real to me now. Kat and our growing child in her belly.Then, she was naked beneath me and my pants were worked back around my thighs. I was hard and riding up and down against her before I knew it.“Quickly,” she breathed.I pumped into her, slipping inside as easily as putting on a glove. She was more real than the world around us. Her breasts leapt back and forth gently against my chest. Her breath was hot and anxious on mine.“Oh, god, Kat,” I groaned.“Cum inside me.”
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